The Problem with “Fake It Till You Make It”
Self-confidence is a crucial aspect of success in life. It enables individuals to believe in themselves and their abilities, to take risks and make decisions, and to overcome challenges and obstacles. However, there is a popular saying that suggests that one can “fake it till they make it” when it comes to confidence. While this approach may seem tempting, it can be problematic in the long run. In this blog, we will explore the problem with “fake it till you make it” and why authenticity is key to true self-confidence.
The problem with “fake it till you make it” is that it relies on a lack of authenticity. It suggests that individuals should pretend to be confident, even if they do not feel that way, in the hope that this will eventually lead to real confidence.
“FAKE TILL YOU MAKE IT” DETRACTS FROM SELF CONFIDENCE
The “fake it till you make it” approach can lead to a lack of self-confidence in several ways, including:
- Feeling like a fraud: Pretending to be confident when you are not can make you feel like a fraud, causing you to doubt your abilities and feel like you are not good enough.
- Fear of being exposed: If you are constantly pretending to be something you are not, there is a fear of being exposed or found out, which can cause anxiety and a lack of confidence.
- Not addressing underlying issues: Pretending to be confident without addressing underlying issues or insecurities can lead to a lack of self-awareness and prevent you from making necessary changes to improve your self-confidence.
- Lack of trust: If you are constantly pretending to be someone you are not, it can be difficult for others to trust you, which can impact your relationships and further erode your self-confidence.
- Dependence on external validation: When you rely on the “fake it till you make it” approach, you may become dependent on external validation to feel confident, rather than relying on your own internal sense of self-worth.
Overall, the “fake it till you make it” approach can lead to a lack of authenticity, self-awareness, and trust, which can all contribute to a lack of self-confidence in the long run. It is essential to build true self-confidence by being authentic and honest with oneself and others about one’s strengths and weaknesses.
The problem with this approach is that it can be challenging to maintain a facade of confidence, especially if one’s internal beliefs and feelings do not align with their external behavior. In other words, if someone is pretending to be confident, but deep down, they feel insecure or unsure, they are not being authentic.
“THE CONFIDENCE MYTHS”
Many people believe that being confident means never showing any signs of weakness or vulnerability. They think that if they admit their shortcomings or ask for help, they will be seen as weak or incompetent. However, this couldn’t be further from the truth. True self-confidence comes from being secure enough in oneself to acknowledge one’s weaknesses and to work on improving them. It takes courage to be self-confident because it requires individuals to be vulnerable and honest with themselves and others.
Authenticity, on the other hand, refers to being genuine and honest with oneself and others about one’s strengths and weaknesses. When individuals are authentic, they are not pretending to be something they are not. They are not afraid to be vulnerable, to admit their mistakes, or to ask for help. They accept themselves for who they are, flaws and all, and are comfortable in their own skin. Authenticity is essential for true self-confidence because it allows individuals to connect with others on a deeper level, to build trust, and to be more resilient in the face of challenges.
Authenticity is a trait that many people admire, but few people are truly comfortable embodying. While the idea of being authentic may sound liberating, it can also be terrifying. So why are people scared to be authentic?
People are scared to be authentic because of the fear of rejection. We live in a society that often rewards conformity and punishes those who deviate from the norm. Being authentic means risking rejection from others, whether it’s from friends, family, or even strangers. People may worry that if they show their true selves, they will be judged or ostracized.
Another reason people are scared to be authentic is the fear of vulnerability. Being authentic means being open and honest about your thoughts, feelings, and experiences. It means exposing your vulnerabilities and insecurities. This can be scary because it makes you feel exposed and vulnerable. As Brené Brown, a research professor at the University of Houston, explains: “Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity. If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.”
Contrary to popular belief, being authentic doesn’t mean being selfish or narcissistic. In fact, being authentic can help you build stronger relationships with others. When you’re authentic, you’re more likely to attract people who appreciate you for who you are. You’re also more likely to build trust with others, because they can sense that you’re being honest and genuine.
TIPS FOR BUILDING AUTHETICITY
Here are some tips for building authenticity:
- Practice self-reflection: Take time to reflect on your values, beliefs, and experiences. Understand what makes you unique and embrace it.
- Be vulnerable: Share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences with others. This can be scary, but it is essential for building authentic connections with others.
- Accept your imperfections: No one is perfect, and that’s okay. Accept your flaws and work on improving them, rather than trying to hide them.
- Be honest with yourself: Don’t pretend to be something you’re not. Be honest with yourself about your strengths and weaknesses, and work on developing a realistic sense of self.
In conclusion, “fake it till you make it” may seem like a quick fix for confidence, but it is a flawed approach because it relies on a lack of authenticity. True self-confidence comes from being genuine and honest with oneself and others about one’s strengths and weaknesses. Building authenticity takes time and courage, but it is worth it because it allows individuals to connect with others on a deeper level and to be more resilient in the face of challenges.
